The most talked about press conference ever occurs tomorrow.  Tiger Woods will face a select group of media.  Every sports report I saw today was focused on what Tiger will or will not say.  Some were kind, some were not, but all want to know what he has on his mind.  I believe grace is available to Tiger, just as it is to all of us, which I wrote about HERE and HERE.

Tiger is a celebrity and a role model, so I understand the media attention. At the same time, Tiger is a private citizen and ultimately he’s accountable to God and his family, not me or others. Still, if Tiger were calling me tonight for advice, or if I could somehow get word to him, this is what I would have him say:

• I’m sorry
• I was wrong
• It was my fault
• I’m getting help…I can’t do this alone
• Please extend grace to me and my family and hold me accountable
• I’m moving forward

He shouldn’t have to answer details about his personal life that at this point will not change the situation. Hopefully Tiger will repent, restore, and return to the game of golf.  Don’t we all love a good story of restoration?

Are you listening Tiger? Tiger, if you are, you may want to read THIS POST or THIS POST also.

What do you think Tiger should say?

Do you hope he returns to the game of golf?

What do you think of when you look at this picture?

I know what I am tempted to see:

I see an eyesore…
I see what’s left of someone’s dream…
I see a has been building…
I see a useless piece of rubble…

…But what if this were only the before picture?

What if the AFTER picture was a brand new remodeled, modern building utilizing the front wall of the old building?

Would that make a difference in your perception about this picture?

Sometimes we tend to look at the present and forget about the amazing power in a future.

Your current story may be awful. You may feel your dream is gone. You may wonder if anything good can come of your brokenness.

One thing is sure; you cannot change your story, but you can allow the power of God to work in you to bring about a better story.

Never underestimate the power of God’s intervention in your life. He uses broken, mixed up, hurting, fractured stories to mold and shape some of His greatest work.

Are you ready?  Have you got one of those great stories of God’s power to change a life?  I’d love to hear it.

(For more ideas on how to recover from a painful past, read this POST and this POST and this POST.)

Are you avoiding your story? Do you often wish you could escape the past?

One famous Bible character never seemed to escape her story.

I have always found it interesting that Rahab continued to be known as a harlot…a prostitute…a hooker… (Sorry for the crude word, but that probably best captures how she must have been viewed at one point in her life.)

In Hebrews 11, the so-called faith chapter, where God chronicles the examples of superior faith, Rahab is still referred to as “Rahab the prostitute”. (Hebrews 11:31) She apparently never fully escaped the title or the memory of her past.

Perhaps the memory of your past gone wrong…all the painful mistakes, the tragedies, the hurts, the failures… remain for a greater purpose…

• To remind you of who He is and what He has done in your life…
• To remind you to help others that struggle…
• To keep you humble or from becoming conceited…

Instead of trying to run from your past, perhaps you should embrace the changes God has brought in your life through that past and the forgiveness He has provided and allow God to use the memory of your sorrow for His glory.

How are you allowing God to use your mistakes, tragedies, heartache and sorrow for a greater good?

If you need some tips on recovering from your past, read this post HERE.

Never recovering after a major personal mistake or failure is what keeps some people from ever accomplishing much in life.  All of us make mistakes, but I am referring to the ones that cause major pain to yourself and those you love.  Even this type of failure does not have to stop you from achieving your dreams and goals. A lot of bouncing back in life depends on your response and attitude after the fall.

Here are a few steps to help you get back on track after you have a major failure in life:

Apologize – If the error was your fault, then be humble enough to admit your mistake and ask forgiveness.  Taking responsibility for your actions is never a bad thing to do.  Spend some time with God and the people you injured seeking their forgiveness.  God will grant it easily, others may not, but your job is not to control their response, but to offer a sincere apology.

Change directions – You can’t expect to recover if you keep repeating the same mistakes.

Build protection/accountability – Don’t be foolish enough to think it won’t happen again. It will unless you protect yourself.  You have damaged your proprioceptors  (Read this post) and depending on the size of the failure you may have to retrain yourself not to let the same mistake happen again.

Forgive yourself – Often the hardest thing to do is to let go of the guilt and move forward, but if God can forgiven you, why can’t you?

Stand strong – You will receive the same temptation again.  You will have further opportunity to repeat the same mistakes. Do not allow circumstances to control your life.  Find the power in Christ, yourself and others who believe in you to stay strong.

Set new goals – Dream again.  Find new areas in which you can succeed.  This may be one of the most important steps.  Don’t skip it,

Don’t look back – Once you have sought and received forgiveness and built safeguards into your life, do not allow the past to control your destiny.  Move forward with victory!

Are you allowing your past to control your future?   Get moving towards a new day today!

We are seeing good news about the economy this week. Here is a recap of some I found today:

Florida housing sales up for the 8th month in a row.  Read that story HERE. You will notice that housing prices continue to fall, but remember it was an over-valued market.

General Motors may indeed file for bankruptcy, but they wanted to assure their employees it was part of their reorganization so they actually paid them early.  Read that story HERE.

Wall Street says all the bad news is in now.  That should mean its uphill from here.  Read that story HERE.

Economists think the recession will end this year.  Read that story HERE. (I really think we will find it has already ended months after all the reports are complete.)

Yahoo willing to hold out for big bucks.  Read that story HERE.

And finally, really the one that matters and the one economists have been waiting for, consumers are gaining confidence again. The consumer confidence index had its biggest increase in 6 years.  See that story HERE.

Look for more good news to follow in the coming days.  I don’t know about you, but I’m happy to find some good news!

Yesterday I shared a post about the consequences of making mistakes after a person ignores repeated advice from others. It was based on a Biblical principle found in Proverbs 29:1. You can read that post HERE.

I guess a follow up post is in order, because some reading yesterday’s post may have already made the mistake of ignoring wisdom and now you are reaping the consequences. What should you do? How do you respond to mistakes already made?

Here are some suggestions:

1. Recognize that you cannot erase them now. (Ecclesiastes 11:3) Quit trying to hide them, and begin to embrace the experience of your past for how the pain can benefit you and others in the future.
2. Receive grace and forgiveness. (Hebrews 4:16) There is nothing in your past God cannot forgive. NOTHING.
3. Stop the bleeding. (Ecclesiastes 10:1) Quit making the same mistakes over and over again. Heed the wisdom of others now before you receive further injury.
4. Decide to be a student of wisdom. (Proverbs 15:22) Start listening to wise advice. Surround yourself with people who will speak truth into your life.
5. Move forward with your life and help others. (2 Timothy 2:2) Don’t allow the past to control your future. Instead, let it help you live better and stronger and then use the gained experience to help others avoid your painful mistakes.

What suggestions do you have for people following a costly failure or mistake?

It has amazed me recently how people in our community seem just as afraid about the national economy as people I talk to in other parts of the country. 

I live in one of the greatest cities economically in the nation.  Clarksville, Tennessee recently was awarded a major industrial investment when Hemlock Semiconductors announced an estimated $1.2 Billion investment in our community.  By many reports we are one of the top 10 real estate markets in the country.  A large portion of our retail base is dependent on Fort Campbell, KY’s more than 30,000 troops who are still being paid monthly.  It was announced last week that December was the third highest month for retail sales in our county’s history. 

Do I know people who have lost their jobs?  Absolutely.  Has this economy affected businesses in our community?  Without a doubt.  Are we suffering as a community as bad as other parts of the country?  I don’t think so. 

Still, we seem to suffer from blues by association.  The mood of the national economy has certainly impacted the mood of our community. Even those who have a job are worried.   Perhaps you have experienced similar media-induced moods where you live. 

I watched a CNN interview last week with college students from Georgia.  Some of them have given up hope on their financial futures.  I am a realist, and so I do recognize that the present economic crisis is real, but at the same time, capitalism thrives on hope.  Taking risks, remaining optimistic, and dreaming big dreams are all tenants that made our current system work. 

Instead of, or at least as much as much as, an economic stimulus package, maybe our country needs a good hope stimulus.  

Let it begin with us!  Invest some hope in someone today!  

All of us make mistakes.  How do we respond as a leader when we make one?  I know tons of leaders, pastors included, who like to pretend the mistake never happened or if they are forced to acknowledge it, they tend to blame someone else for the error. 

My 17 year-old son is proving to be an incredible leader.  I recently observed him in one of these situations.  Thankfully he handled it with class. 

Please understand, in speaking of mistakes here I am not referring to moral failures.  Those would need to be covered in another post.  I’m writing about those mistakes that are made unintentionally or as an error of judgment.  These are the things we do such as saying the wrong thing at the wrong time or fail to make a hospital or funeral home visit we should have made.  The mistake could be criticizing people unjustly or failing to recognize someone for their accomplishments.  In business this may be making an error judgment call that proves to be costly to the company.  Nothing in your heart intended to make the error, but you did.  How should a leader respond in those situations? 

Here are my suggestions for handling a mistake:

1.     Accept responsibility.  Don’t pass blame to others if the fault is yours. Be willing to confess your errors.  You aren’t perfect so don’t pretend that you are.

2.     Don’t make excuses for your failure.  If there are legitimate issues that need to be explained or lessons to be learned that’s one thing, but don’t try to excuse your mistake away.

3.     Apologize quickly, humbly, and completely.  Don’t say, “I’m sorry”, but try to wrap the other person into your story.  Simply apologize.  You made a mistake.  Ask forgiveness. 

4.     Regardless of whether forgiveness is given or not, once you have sincerely asked for forgiveness, move forward with the vision.  Get back to leading. 

5.     Try to learn from your mistakes.  The best lessons in my life have come from some of the mistakes I have made. 

What suggestions do you have?  

In my personal ministry, sadly, I experience people more at their moments of failure than in their moments of success.  As an optimist, I plan for success.  I believe God desires success for His people. As a realist, I see failure all around me.  I believe God allows failure and uses it to draw us closer to Him and to teach us valuable insights into our characters and into the character of God Himself.   Failure has been a part of my life (a big part) and it is prevalent in the lives of the most of the successful people I know.  Therefore, we must learn how to recover from failure.   

Here are a few things to remember after and during your moments of failure.   

·         Take time to rest after your failure, but do not sit still for long.  Idleness often leads to temptations and worry. (I almost used another cliché’ involving idleness and the devil, but decided not to.)  Do something, even if it is volunteer work. 

·         Know that not everyone is talking about you, even if it may feel that everyone is. 

·         If people are talking about you, it will not last long until the new “failure of the month” comes along.

·         Take some time to re-evaluate what led to your failure.  Accept fault where appropriate and do not be too proud to say you made a mistake.

·         Learn from your mistakes and build safeguards in your life to keep from repeating the same ones.   

·         Keep your mind and body healthy.  Read, exercise, pray, and think.  It is important to stay fresh for your next opportunity. 

·         Begin to dream new dreams and set new goals.  (These goals can be the same goals you had before you failed if you are willing to take a risk on them again.) 

·         Make a decision in your heart to rise from your failure.  Prove to those who thought you could not (or at least you thought that is what they were saying) that you can succeed.  More than that prove it to you! 

·         Allow failure to make you stronger and better. 

Sometimes life throws curves at us that take the wind from our sail.  If we aren’t careful we can allow the injury to haunt us for life; never regaining what we have lost.  Have you lost a job recently?  Have you had a business failure?  Did you suffer from divorce?  Has the person you trusted the most hurt you the deepest?  

What steps should you take to get back on track and succeed again?  Here are a few suggestions to consider during the recovery process:

1.      Reconnect with God.  This is always a wise idea, but it becomes necessity at times like this. 

2.      Evaluate your life.  Use this time to reevaluate the decisions you have made in life and what got you in the situation you are in today.  Are there changes that you made?  If so, be willing to change.  If you did nothing wrong in this case, release yourself from responsibility. 

3.      Create some new dreams.  Don’t allow past mistakes to keep you from discovering your passions in life.  Keep those creative forces going in your mind so you’ll be ready when the next big opportunity comes along. 

4.      Call in the advisors.  Others can usually see things we cannot see.  They approach our life from a different perspective. Give someone you trust, who has your best interest at heart, access to the painful part of your life.

5.      Don’t take your pain and anger out on others.  It doesn’t make things better (usually worse) and it hurts people who did nothing to deserve it. 

6.      Take a break.  Don’t expect to recover immediately.  Your struggles probably didn’t start overnight and they will not end overnight. Give yourself time to heal.

7.      When it’s time, be willing to risk again.  Yes, you may get hurt again, but just as life is full of disappointments, it’s also full of joy and discovery.  Remember that everyone is not the same and every situation is different. Don’t hold your past experiences against others who weren’t even there.  

8.      Don’t let failure or disappointment in life define you.  Be defined by God’s love for you and His plan for your life.

9.      Do something.  Rest yes, but at some point, just do something to stay busy and occupy your mind.  It’s true that the “idle mind is the devil’s workshop”.  If you lost your job, find somewhere to volunteer until you find another job.  If you lost a relationship, find non-sexual relationships through church or civic activities to keep from being alone.

10.    Get back in the game.   Choose your next steps carefully and don’t keep repeating the same mistakes, but at some point it will be time to enjoy life again.  Life was not meant to be lived on the sidelines.