Most of us live our lives with some kind of fear.  That’s probably uncontrollable to a great extent. We live in a very fearful world. What would it be like to live your life apart from fear or with less fear?  Here are some points of understanding which can help us become less afraid of the unknown situations of life. 

Life can be uncertain.

There are lots of unknowns in the world.  That makes people afraid.  Most people would prefer to know the outcome of a situation and yet many times, probably most of the time, we do not get that privilege.  Most of the horrifying experiences of my life seem to come upon me suddenly.    We tend to want the expected to occur, but we should always be prepared, at least emotionally, for the unexpected. 

Fear is an emotion and not necessarily a reality.

Someone actually defined fear as a felt reaction to a perceived danger.  We innately have the ability to respond quickly to danger.  Sometimes we can feel that a situation is going to be scary before it actually is.  Our reaction to that sense of fear often determines how well we handle the situation. 

We must keep ourselves from allowing negative scenarios to build in our mind. People often take a fear and begin to build scenarios in their mind of what might, could, or is going to happen.  Most often these scenarios are irrational.  When the emotion of fear begins we must analyze its rationality and if it is based on an unknown occurrence we must dismiss it as strictly emotion and not reality. 

Sometimes we must face our fears in order to receive victory over them.

We can’t allow fear to alter God’s plans for our life or steal our joy.  We should not be too surprised if in our weakness and fear God encourages us to be strong.  When Elijah was hiding out from Jezebel because he was terrified, God sent him back to face her again. (1 Kings 19) Elijah had to go back before he could go forward. God will often allow us to face our fears as well. 

Ask yourself two questions:

1. What fear do you need to face before you can get on with your life? 

2. Is fear holding you back from moving forward in some area of your life?

There are two consistent themes in the Bible.  We are to walk by faith and we are not to be afraid.  I think those two themes are related to each other. It takes doing the first to accomplish the second. 

God has a plan even when our fear tells us that He doesn’t. 

Since fears are an emotional response and emotions are not always reliable, fears will often cause people to lose their trust and dependence on God. At the same time, God will often use fear to draw people to Him.  Most people grow best when they are being stretched by life.  God often uses faith-stretching events; times when people are most afraid, to grow and mature His people.  One time Jesus made His disciples get into the boat, even though He probably knew as the Creator that a storm was approaching.  Faith must tell us that God’s plan is secure, even when our fear says otherwise. 

Grow more in love with God. 

Perhaps the greatest secret to overcoming fear in the Bible is found in 1 John 4:18, which says, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.”  Perfect love casts out fear.  If ever a person could perfectly know the love of God he would never have to be afraid again.  Whenever we run from the challenges of life, God has to wonder why.  He must wonder “Am I not enough?  Do you think this is too big for me?” As we grow in our love for and our trust in God we will be better able to live our lives in a confident assurance that God is in full control. 

To continue to mature as believers we must be working to rid our life of the fear that keeps us from completely following and trusting in God. 

I was reflecting the other day (which is something I seem to do a lot lately) on my life and the way God has used me to impact my two sons.   I have been an “intentional” parent.  I know all parents are intentional in what they do, but what I mean is that I have specifically parented with an intended purpose; to mold young men who passionately love and serve God with their lives.  As I think about the men they are becoming, by God’s grace, that goal is being accomplished.  The thought occurred to me, however, that as much as I’ve tried to teach them directly and indirectly; by word or by modeling, much of life is learned by experience.  With that thought, I realized there are life principles I know not because someone taught me, but because I lived them. 

These are things I want my boys to know, but I don’t think I ever taught them:

1.      There are some things in life you will never understand and I can’t explain them to you.

2.      The lust for a woman can destroy your life.  Be careful.

3.      You need other men in your life.  I can only take you so far.  Always surround yourself with men you aspire to be like and let them invest in you.

4.      You need to invest in other men; especially those younger than you.

5.      Be willing to risk everything to follow God’s call on your life now; while you are young.  (Then never get too old for this principle.)

6.      Always be a dreamer.  It keeps you young; plus your dreams for your life will never be bigger than God’s vision for your life.

7.      The greatest things in life money can’t buy. 

I may think of more, but these are on my heart today. 

What do you wish you could teach your children? 

Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy, but because of the increased demands on time and finances, plus the fact that messy relationships get messier this time of year, all make it difficult sometimes to really enjoy the season.  As you plan your Christmas season, here are a few tips to help you have a more spirit-filled celebration. 

1.      Use this season to change your priorities where needed. If your priorities have gotten out of line lately, put them back where they belong this Christmas.

2.      Consider what you have now. Sure, you may have experienced losses this year, but most of us are still pretty blessed.

3.      Find a way to serve others this holiday season.  It is the season of giving. Giving, especially if you don’t have to, has a way of bringing joy to your heart.

4.      Make Christmas less of a spending spree this year.  Set a budget limit of what you can afford to pay for…with cash…and then don’t stress about anything else. (You are probably buying too much for people you don’t even like anyway.)  There could actually be good to come from a down economic time if you start to clean up financial mistakes of the past and started living more responsibly with your finances.   

5.      Incorporate Jesus into your celebration. Seems to make a lot of sense.  It’s His birthday. 

I have seen lots of blog posts about the reason to Twitter.  I decided to give my top reasons also.  Besides the desire to be on top of the latest trends, these are my main reasons to Twitter:

1.      Networking.  I have met so many cool people who are interested in the same things I am on Twitter.  When I choose to follow someone I also check out their blog if they have one.  I’ve found great blogs this way.

2.      Idea Generating.  Most of the news stories I’ve followed lately generated first on Twitter. Twitter seems to be the current quickest way breaking news stories or stories of great interest enter the world.  Twitter was an awesome way to keep up with the presidential election.  Both candidate’s campaigns Twittered.

3.      Mind Dump.  I’m an introvert. For you extraverts, that doesn’t mean I don’t have thoughts.  I have lots of them. I just generally don’t voice them if you are always talking.  Twitter allows me to say what’s on my mind in a way that is comfortable for my personality without feeling like I’m interupting someone.

4.      Rest my thoughts.  I’m programmed and purposefully keep my mind continuously moving.  Twitter provides me a good breaking point in my thought process that helps me stay fresh with what I’m working on at the time. 

5.      Kingdom building.  I’ve done Internet ministry for over 15 years now.  (www.mustardseedministry.com)  Twitter is another avenue to expand my ministry.  It is one of the leading ways people find my blog.  If I’m putting stuff there that I think is valuable, why would I not take advantage of an opportunity like Twitter to market it more? 

Feel free to follow me on Twitter here.  If you are not currently using Twitter, then what are you waiting for?

Why do you use Twitter?

Someone shared this with me. Wish I would have had it in time for my message Sunday.

Today I tried to help us get a jump on the holidays by encouraging us to have a more child-like faith. Jesus said “unless you become like little children you cannot enter the Kingdom of Heaven.”  (Matt 18)  Children are filled with wonder and hope; seldom worrying about tomorrow.  You can hear the complete message HERE.  

Before I even returned home from church I had this email waiting for me.  I thought it was a good enough story to share, so I asked the writer for permission. 

Dear Ron,

Today when you asked who already had their Christmas tree up, I had to proudly smile and giggle inside. Let me tell you why.
     
I don’t really remember much about our family Christmases before I was 10 years old. However, I will never forget Christmas the year I was 10 (1990) and how it changed my family forever. Rather than waking up on Christmas morning and running to see what was under the tree, I was woke up and given my first lesson on death. My grandma had died, just that morning. Being the age I was, I didn’t understand why Grandma had to die in the 1st place (she was only 60), and why she “Went to live with God” and left us on Christmas?
  
The following weeks were the most trying for my family as my mother and her 2 sisters struggled with the death of their mother after having already lost their father to suicide when they were just children themselves. I remember them yelling and screaming, blaming each other for things from decades past, and my 2 cousins and myself just got lost in the shuffle of it all. We were told that missing Grandma was not something to talk about because they missed her more. After all it was their mother. We were told that there was no Christmas that year and that there may never be another Christmas for this family. That’s a lot for 3 small children to digest.
   
The years that followed were rarely joyous or spent celebrating. The season itself was a reminder of the loss and just seemed to stir up old hatred and still raw emotions.
   
In 1998 I married into a huge family with just the opposite approach to the holiday. Everyone gathered each year at Granny and Gramps’ house in the country where there was no internet and even my father in law’s satellite cell phone didn’t get a signal. The holiday was spent as a family laughing and singing and giving gifts in honor of the birth, and life, that was being celebrated. No one yelled or blamed, no one slammed doors or cried. I, however, had a meltdown. My young husband of 18 years of age didn’t understand why I wanted to hide in the upstairs bedroom and just cry alone. It was all just too much and very overwhelming for me. I felt I had been robbed of a holiday that should be about happiness by a family that couldn’t see that they were destroying it for us kids.

For the 8 Christmases following that, I didn’t put up a tree. I didn’t really decorate. I hadn’t been to church since I left home, and I really didn’t see any need in acknowledging the holiday at all. Several of those years my husband was deployed and I spent Christmas in our home, alone with just my dog and some movies to fill the time until I went back to work on Monday.
  
This year though….something in me changed. My daughter is 2 ½. She had a very rough start in this world but is doing amazing now. We walked by a Christmas tree the other day and she lit up! For a child with severe social delays and inabilities to display much emotion, this was a moment I never thought I’d see in her. She smiled, laughed, and clapped her hands together. My heart stopped. It was clear as day, Christmas had to be celebrated this year, if for nothing else, for the joy of my child. I bought a Christmas tree, ornaments, and a toy nativity set. Last night while my daughter played with Mary, Joseph, and baby Jesus, I assembled our tree and decorated with all the lights and tinsel I could find. In our attic I came across old ornaments I literally had not seen in 18 years. They reminded me of those awful Christmases of my childhood, but I hung them on the tree anyway. Now they are a reminder that even with all I had felt about Christmas for so long, there was still a reason to celebrate.
 
It took many years and the birth of my own child to bring me back to celebrating the birth of another very special child. So, yes, my Christmas tree is already up, and decorated, and underneath it sits a simple manger scene with the true reason for the season.
 
Thank you for your message today. It really hit home in my heart.

We ought always to thank God for you, brothers, and rightly so, because your faith is growing more and more, and the love every one of you has for each other is increasing.
  
2 Thessalonians 1:3-4 NIV
  
The greatest compliment you can give to your pastor is to personally be growing spiritually. If you want to really get your pastor excited, let him see you excited about your relationship with Christ.
  
The pastor’s job is to help you become more like Jesus. He is assigned by God to shepherd the church, equipping the saints to do the work of the church. He is not the doer as much as he is the equipper. He should be building people who are doing God’s work in the church, the community, and around the world.
  
That’s the pastor’s part, but how is the pastor successful in his work? When people are doing their part; growing in the Lord, doing the work of the church. The catch is this. The pastor can’t make you do your part. He can’t force you to be molded into the image of Christ. He can’t demand that you obey the Word of God. He can encourage, teach, pray and lead by example, but he cannot make you do what you are not willing to do.
  
Give your pastor a great gift. Grow in your Christian walk!

Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the saints. Philemon 7 NIV
 
Your pastor needs you to love him…even when he makes mistakes.
 
Do you love your pastor? Do you thank God for the person God has sent to lead your church? Here’s a more important question: does your pastor know you love him?
 
I can tell you that there are many pastors today that wonder if anyone cares for them. Most pastors hear far more complaints than they hear encouragement. Everyone always shares burdens with the pastor, but few people stop just to share love with their pastor.
 
Have you figured out yet that your pastor is not perfect? He is a flawed individual, just like you are, that God has appointed to shepherd your church. Many times he didn’t even ask God for the assignment, but he has been obedient to God’s call upon his life. Can’t you just love a guy like that? He may have put his career objectives on hold, just so he could do God’s will and minister to you! Have you ever thought about it like that?
   
Why not think of how you can show your love for your pastor today? 

(I hope for those at my church reading this that they can understand I minister to lots of pastors.  This is not a personal plea. Thanks for always showing how much you love me. Grace is a great place!) 

At my first defense, no one came to my support, but everyone deserted me. May it not be held against them. But the Lord stood at my side and gave me strength, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. And I was delivered from the lion’s mouth.2 Timothy 4:16-17 NIV
 
Paul knew what it felt like to feel all alone. It’s a scary feeling. Many pastors today know that feeling. Of course, God is “our refuge and strength and ever present help in time of trouble”, but the pastor needs to know that he has the support of a few people. There needs to be some people he can always depend on to encourage him in his daily walk with the Lord.   
  
I want you to know that being a pastor is sometimes a lonely place to be. God has given us human relationships in order that we might provide physical strength and encouragement to each other to help us along life’s journey. The pastor often feels left out of this plan. Please don’t let that happen to your pastor!    
 
If your pastor has an idea for the church, support him unless you have a better idea or what the pastor is proposing is un-Biblical. Be willing to not only voice your support, but provide physical, financial, and moral support to the pastor’s plan. Be a physical encourager by complimenting the pastor, praying for him, sending him an occasional note or email, and simply putting an arm around him and saying “thanks”. Don’t forget to encourage his family as well.   
  
Our pastors need our support. They need to know we care. They need encouragement. There has never been a more stressful time to be a pastor than in the world today. Tell yours you care about him (or her) today!

If we have sown spiritual seed among you, is it too much if we reap a material harvest from you? If others have this right of support from you, shouldn’t we have it all the more? 1 Corinthians 9:11-12 NIV  
 
Your pastor needs to be supported financially. He should not have to worry about how he is going to feed his family.    (I am thankful to have planted a church that believes in supporting its pastors.)
 
I haven’t met any strong, Biblical pastors who don’t realize that the ministry is a sacrifice. Most pastors don’t expect to be wealthy. Most pastors know that the ministry is a life of faith, even in the area of finances. They shouldn’t, however, have to beg for support. The burden of support should be on those receiving the ministry.   
    
Now I fully realize that there are those who take advantage of the ministry and the generosity of others, but God will deal with those, and, I believe, He will do so severely. The principle and reasoning here though is much as we saw in Part 1 of this series. The pastor needs to be free of concerns which will keep him from properly focusing on the powerful delivery of God’s Word. His primary function according to Scripture is “to equip the saints”.  He will never do this effectively if he is worried about paying his light bill or providing for an education for his children.  
    
How is your pastor being treated financially? Is he comfortable? Is he able to concentrate on what God has called him to do? Is there some tangible way you could express your love and appreciation to your pastor?