I am asked dozens of questions about what we did or didn’t do as parents. I am amazed that God has allowed us to raise the two young men we have in our house, but there were a few principles we practiced consistently.

Here are three principles for parenting I think all parents should consider:

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4 NIV

Fathers are not usually seen as the nurturing ones in a family. When my boy’s get sick, they don’t want me, they want Cheryl. The Bible, however, tends to also place the father in a nurturing position. We are told not to “exasperate” our children, which means not to wear them out with correction, but to “bring them up”. That phrase literally means that we spend time with them on a regular basis and encourage them in the development of their character.  That sounds like nurturing to me.

I said at the beginning of this message on parenting, delivered at Grace Community Church, that I could not answer the entire “how to” questions about parenting. My desire was to offer a paradigm of principles for effective parenting. I really do believe if you follow these principles you will truly live out the Biblical principle of “Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it.” (Proverbs 22:6)

The Grace Community Church middle school camp is this week. Thanks to our family pastor Michael Bayne for letting me grab this video from his blog. (I didn’t ask permission, so I hope he’s okay with this.) Our youngest son Nate is serving as student pastor this summer and so he’s at the camp and in the video. I wish they would let me go sometime. I’d show them a water party!

I’m working on some blog posts, messages, and perhaps even a book on fathering. I’m especially interested in addressing the absence of a strong father figure in a person’s life, since I see it as a huge scar in many people’s life.

You can help me with this part of my ministry. Please consider completing my survey on fathering. It’s quick and easy and all responses are anonymous.

Here’s a quick message to my boys. My boys are 21 and 18 years old. I wish someone had given me this advice when I was their age. (Perhaps you need to hear it as well.)

I’m curious. What type of relationship did you or do you have with your earthly father? I have asked this question dozens of times to different groups of men and women with surprising results.

She was referring to a comment I have made many times as a father. I have stated that the pinnacle of success for me would be to one day receive one of those sappy, mushy plaques that talks about what a great dad I am…from children that really mean the words. I guess in this modern age of social media, today I received my first plaque.

This is a blessing to watch. What are you going through that you would have never asked for, but have no choice but to endure? You can choose to embrace the unknown by trusting God, or you can become bitter and resist the great things He can do through suffering. I look forward to watching as God continues to develop Colt McCoy’s life.

One question I’ve been wrestling with since I’ve been at Moody is what the local church in America should look like. Since being here I’ve received some opposition towards the way Grace does church in Clarksville. I’ve gotten lots of questions like: Do small groups provide accurate means for discipleship? Is the governmental structure too corporate, and as a result too secular? Do topical messages truly teach the Bible? Should the environments be tailored for believers or non-believers?