Let’s:
Forget what is behind and press on…
Not grow weary in doing good…
Consider others better than ourselves…
Love our enemy…
Pray continually…
Humble ourselves…
Forgive as we’ve been forgiven…
Let your light shine before men…
Cast our cares upon Him…
Lay up treasures in Heaven…
Judge not, lest you be judged…
Seek so we will find…
Tomorrow is a new day….
What else should we do today?
One thing I learned in obtaining a master’s in leadership is that defining leadership is difficult. John Maxwell says, “Leadership is influence.” I love that simple definition. Still, I have observed that there are many myths when it comes to even what that means.
A position makes one a leader – Some believe that simply having a big or fancy title makes one a leader. Not true. I’ve known many people with a position whom no one was truly following. They may give out orders and command a certain obedience, but no one is willingly following their lead.
If I’m not hearing anyone complain, everyone must be happy – The fact is that sometimes the leader is the last to know about a problem. Some people are intimidated by leadership. Other times, they don’t know how to approach the leader, so they complain to others, but not the leader.
I can lead everyone the same way - Actually, people are different and require different leadership styles. (Read a post I wrote about that subject HERE.)
Leadership and management are the same thing – Great organizations need both, but they are not equal and they require different skills. (Read a post I wrote about one difference HERE.)
Being the leader makes you popular – The truth is, many times the opposite is true. Leaders can be very lonely people. (I wrote about that HERE.)
Leaders must be extroverted charismatics – Not true. Some of the best leaders I know are very introverted and subdued. Leadership is about influence. If someone is trustworthy, dependable and going somewhere, others will follow.
Leaders accomplish by controlling others - Absolutely not. That’s not leadership, that’s dictatorship. Effective leaders encourage others to lead, be creative, and take ownership and responsibility for accomplishing the vision. (Read the difference in leading people and controlling people HERE.)
What other myths about leadership have you observed?
Some of life’s greatest lessons come packaged in a hard personal experience. I’ve learned a few things in life, but truly, the greatest things I know came through mistakes, failures and disappointments.
What are some hard lessons you’ve had to learn?
I love simple! Maybe it’s because my simple mind can comprehend simple. 
Watch this short video TED Talk. It’s simple, but you could use the simplicity to change some areas of your life. Take a few minutes and be encouraged.
I have a few ideas of how this could help me.
How about you? Anything you’d like to try to improve or achieve?
I’m a huge proponent of moving forward. I’ve never been a fan of remaining in the past.
That could be because I’ve had some past I’d rather not remember…
It could be because I am very forward-thinking…
Either way, I’d prefer to reconcile the past, make the most of it, and get on with my life.
Bottom line, however, is that there are really a few choices when it comes to dealing with the past.
Forget it - If you choose to and you are really skilled, you can block all memory of the past from your mind. In extreme settings, I have seen people do this naturally, but I must admit, it’s rare.
Misuse it – You can twist the past for your benefit…gain sympathy, make people feel sorry for you, and use it as a somewhat personal advantage. The people who choose this option are usually as phony as their story.
Ignore it – You can pretend your past never happened. You man make up your own version of your past and live in a false reality. With the people I’ve seen do this it seems you never really know the true person behind this use of the past.
Excuse it – You can blame every bad decision you’ll ever make on your past. After all, it was “his” fault”, right? I’ve known people with this excuse who never own up to responsibility…and they always have a reason for not doing so.
Use it - In my humble opinion, as one with a somewhat broken past, the best way to deal with your past is to use it for a greater good. How could your story benefit others? How could God use your brokenness to bless others?
Ladies, here’s a secret your husband probably won’t share…
Your support feeds his God-given ego…
Sure, that ego can be abused…
But just as you need his unconditional love, he needs your unconditional respect…
I realize you nor he is capable of perfectly fulfilling those individual needs…
But at least you know the secret now…
You see…
Doing well for the woman he loves is perhaps one of the greatest goals in a man’s life…
That inner desire starts at a very early age…
The little league ball player who turns around to see if mom watches him bat…
The same little boy who brings a flower (weed ) home to mom…it’s the respect he’s seeking…
The truth is sometimes a guy feels as if he doesn’t measure up…actually a lot of times…
(Please don’t tell him I told you this…)
He feels the weight of being wonderful in so many areas…his home, his family, his work…even in his hobby…
It’s a pressure men carry internally…mostly never sharing it with anyone…
Chances are that fear of failure is his greatest fear…
He sees you doing so well with all your responsibilities…the home, the kids, relationships…
Even your walk with God shines brighter than his sometimes…okay…most times…
You handle things so well, in fact…at times, he’s tempted not to even try…
(Please don’t tell him I told you this )
One time after preaching…Cheryl said nothing…
Usually she says “Great job today”…or…”That was a good one”
That day…nothing…
3 days later…I asked, “Was I that bad?”…
I needed her positive feedback and encouragement….it’s what fuels me…
Your husband does too…
I know that sounds shallow of us…perhaps it is…
But…
Here’s the best part of the secret….
Maybe even start doing the dishes….brag on him when he does that too…
Maybe next will be the dusting…nah…don’t push it!
Next time your little boy…I mean big boy…is up to bat…make sure he can turn around and see you smiling…
(This is a revised version of a post I did a couple years ago, and a light-hearted way to address a serious issue I see in many marriages.)
For more of my marriage advice, go HERE.
Leading an organization is just like driving a car…
Okay, it’s not exactly like that, but leading an organization is hard work, regardless of the size of the organization or even the strength of a team. It is often difficult to think through all the issues that the leader should be considering. I have found it helpful at times to compare organizational health and success to other things I may understand even more; things I do everyday. For example, I can consider the health of the team in an organization by comparing it to the dynamics of family relationships. This type exercise helps me clarify principles of organizations I might not otherwise think about and create a paradigm of leadership that hopefully makes leading easier. It’s simply a tool to help you brainstorm.
Recently I thought about how organizations have a great deal in common with the road system most of us use everyday. I began thinking how leading an organization can at times be like driving a car and it helped me process some issues relative to our organizational health.
For example, any organization has:
Freeways - Sometimes the organization can proceed quickly, with limited interruption. (We like those times.)
Potholes - Small things often slow the organization down, but progress continues. (We should take time to address potholes before they become major road damage.)
Detours - Often the organization is still heading for the same end goal, but may be forced to go at it from a different direction. (Too many times, instead of detouring we change our destination.)
Speed bumps - There are times we need to slow down, reflect on where we are, adjust our speed, and continue forward. (We can’t always keep the pace of the freeway, so we consider when a speed bump is in order.)
Exits - These provide a safe way off the freeway to refuel, relax, and readjust the direction. (We shouldn’t wait too long to find the needed exit, even if it’s for a short bathroom break! I learned that one from my wife )
Accidents - Accidents can be our fault or the fault of another, but they often set us back for a period of time. (See what needs repairing, what needs replacing, and when to call it a “total loss”.)
Flat tires – At times, team members can be injured by simply wearing out, a serious puncture wound, or damage caused by another. (Leaders should always be watching the health of the tires.)
Road signs - In every organization, there are signs which the leader needs to learn to recognize…when momentum slows, when people are stressed, or when the vision needs refueling. (Don’t ignore the directional or the warning signs.)
The list of these imageries could continue much longer. You could attach ideas to things such as stop lights, reverse, neutral, intersections, road rage, etc…anything that helps you think, but by now you should have the idea I’m working with…what other road illustrations could you make as they relate to organizational success?
You can carry these thoughts even further than I have, with how to address each issue, how addressing them with your travel would relate to how you address them in the organization, and how each one impacts you safely reaching your destination. Again, this is just a framework by which to help you think through more complex organizational issues about which you may not otherwise think.
Can you see how an exercise like this can be helpful in thinking through organizational health and success?
Most people who know me well know I like to run…
I have lots of other runners around me…
I get many invitations to run with other people…
I occasionally do, and have enjoyed the conversations…
But I generally prefer to run alone…
Why?
Running is my down time…
It’s where I think the best…
It’s where I unwind most…
It’s where I’m freed of technology, and conversation, and stress…
It’s where God sometimes chooses to speak to me…
I run alone because it one way I’m made a better person…
What is that one thing you do best alone?
Winners of Scott Williams “Church Diversity”:
Ryan Hernandez
Scott Luck
Jeff Guild
@tx4evr
@jerburroughs
I’ve contacted you for your address.
Congratulations! Look for your signed copy soon!
My friend Scott Williams has a new book called Church Diversity. He’s addressing a little talked about, but important issue in the church…DIVERSITY. Church Diversity is a movement encouraging book, a quick, fun read, and Scott is passionate about this issue. You can find out more at ChurchDiversity.com
Watch an interview I did with Scott recently and then see below how to enter to win this book. Tomorrow I’ll award five copies personally signed by Scott Williams.
To win a signed copy of Church Diversity:
I’ll give 5 copies away randomly tomorrow morning.
Healthy teams have some things in common with other healthy teams.
Healthy teams:
Evaluate – Healthy teams are willing to think critically, without getting their feelings hurt, in order to continue to improve things.
Encourage – Healthy teams make a concerted effort to encourage others on the team.
Construct – Healthy teams build a solid foundation together so the vision is completed beyond the span of a team member.
Challenge – Healthy teams challenge each other when there is a need, in an effort to hold one another accountable, and keep the team healthy.
Cooperate – Healthy teams learn to get along, even when they don’t agree with each other, for the good of the vision and the team.
That’s my list…
What would you add?
Mustard Seed Thoughts
