Is fear an appropriate tool for motivation?

We see it in many segments of society.

Rental car companies use it to sell extras to a rental contract…..

I receive dozens of emails from pastors each week. This one caught my attention and I asked permission to use it here. Hopefully others will benefit from my response and weigh in with their own thoughts. I have changed his name.

Ron,

I hope all is well with you. I frequent your blogs ever so often via twitter, which I do enjoy. the reason for this email is for some direction. It is my belief that the Lord has called me to be a pastor, however I am presently single. I wanted to find out what are some of the qualities one should look for and how should I go about finding a wife as a future pastor. I have been keeping the issue in prayer.

I would love to hear your thoughts.

Sincerely,

Mike

Dear Mike,

Most likely you will not be able to pick every expectation or qualification you have for a spouse. I think is is wise, however, to have a goal. You are more likely to reach a target for which you aim. With that in mind, here are 7 qualities I believe make up the ideal pastor’s wife:

Last week I wrote about living with introversion in the ministry. You can read

7 Pitfalls of Being an Introverted Pastor

and

7 Ways I Work with Introversion to Protect My Ministry

Each of these posts, and every post I ever do about introversion, creates interest from those who share this part of my personality. I had several people at church this week comment on the posts. Apparently, this is an issue worth talking about more!

In an effort to help people, my online friend Adam McHugh, who writes a blog called Introverted Church, is offering his book Introverts in the Church to my readers.

Just discovered this Ted video with Billy Graham talking about technology and faith. He’s humorous, engaging, and helpful about how to deal with technology in the future. He’s talking to a secular audience in 1998, but his words are still practical.

Enjoy some time listening to this honored man:

Pastor burnout is a common problem in the church today. I hear from pastors everyday facing the stress of ministry.

Here’s a common scenario that can cause that to happen…it may be the most common one I hear…perhaps this is your story:

I am often confronted with issues where one person has wronged another person. At times people expect me, as the pastor, to enforce morals on people in order to change them. Some how they believe if I talk to them, I can “force” them to change their ways.

I have learned one principle well. Rules never change people.

School is back in session. Summer is drawing to a close. The excitement of fall, though not evident in the weather yet, is in the air at Grace Community Church. We launch a new series this week and it’s one I’m very excited about, because I sense the need so strongly.

5ive is a series about five hidden killers of our walk with Christ. These are things we may try to pretend don’t exist in our life, but if we are honest, we know they can destroy our joy, peace, and quality of life with God and others.

Do you struggle most with guilt, anger, jealousy, greed or pride? Take your pick. Each week we will address another issue.

This is the series you will not want to miss…and you’ll want to invite your friends.

Join us as we learn some principles to guide our hearts and lives to better places.

Elijah had been used of God to hold back rain from the people for over 3 years, because of their sins. Obviously, he was not well liked as a preacher. I can only imagine the stress he experienced during those years. Something struck me recently, however, that seemed to further complicate Elijah’s situation.

Consider 1 Kings 18:1 “After a long time, in the third year, the word of the LORD came to Elijah: “Go and present yourself to Ahab, and I will send rain on the land.”

According to a couple NT passages, this “After a long time” was actually 3 ½ years. The famine was 3 ½ years long. For 3 ½ years, the people apparently continued to sin, Elijah continued to hold on by faith, but God said nothing. God was apparently inactive, not speaking, even to His great servant Elijah.

Have you ever been there? Has the silence of God in your life ever been eerily strong?

Imagine you had been faithfully serving…God is using you…you are in constant communication with Him…and then suddenly…everything is quiet.

The separation must have seemed unbearable. Elijah is un-liked and unpopular; he’s an outcast from the people and the One he trusted most was seemingly absent. God would soon do a miracle through Elijah, but during this period, all Elijah could do was wait.

If you have been believer for very long at all, you have had periods where it seems God is nowhere to be found. We often call them periods of spiritual dryness. Sometimes I refer to it as being in a spiritual funk.

What should we do during the times of silence, before the miracles of God come through for us?

I have the opportunity to sit with many people who are experiencing disappointment in life. Many times, even when we are doing the best we know how, we find ourselves disappointed with where we find ourselves in life at the time…

We don’t get the job…
The ministry doesn’t appear to be working…
The marriage unravels…
The children go astray…
The business fails…
The spouse cheats…

Having faced disappointment many times in life, I’ve learned a few things about handling these times.

Here are 7 pieces of wisdom for the disappointments of life:

Someone recently pointed out to me a principle they had always believed, until it didn’t come true for them. They were disappointed in the principle. I had to remind myself of yet another principle. Principles are great, but they aren’t promises; they are principles.

I love principles. I believe in them. I write about them. I even attempt to live my life by some of them.

But principles of men aren’t guaranteed to come true.

You can count on the promises of God, but don’t expect the principles of men to work every time. The truth is that life happens…and sometimes life is more powerful than a principle.

Take one famous John Maxwell principle