My mom is my hero.

She’s the most gracious, forgiving, patient person I know.

My mom raised 3 children mostly as a single mom. My dad finished life well, (I wrote about that HERE) before dying a couple years ago, but to fully understand my life, you would have to know that for much a my life, my dad was an absentee father. That put a huge burden on my mom. Some of you know the hardship of the single mom, and it’s one I never take lightly. My mom sometimes worked as many as three jobs, but honestly, I never remember her not being home.

She kept our house immaculate, she cooks better than anyone I know, she can sew, cross-stitch, and raise a garden. She is grounded in tradition, but she’s loving Facebook. My mom mothered the neighborhood and the people with whom she worked. She’s never met a stranger and she has no enemies. My mother is growing in her faith even in her 70′s. She loves God passionately and boldly and prayed my father and sister back to Jesus. (I’m fairly confident she’s praying for me too.)

My mom rocks!

My mom has taught me what unconditional love and support looks and feels like in a human sense. Regardless of what I’ve done or where I’ve gone in life, one person is always my biggest supporter.

Thanks mom! I love you! Happy Mother’s Day!

Words can never express…

I remember when the boys were at home.

The house was loud.

There were endless hours of them performing “shows” for us. Of course, we had to “love them”.

Balls were constantly flying through the air.

The floor was used as a wrestling ring.

Every night was filled with a practice or ballgame.

We had little “free time” for ourselves.

Clothes were left lying on floor.

The toilets weren’t always flushed.

The boys usually didn’t help around the house unless forced to do so.

They left the top off the toothpaste.

They didn’t want to go to bed on time.

They didn’t want to get up in the morning.

I hated science projects.

They had lots of science projects.

They really did take a lot of our time.

In some ways, they cramped our style.

They certainly altered our plans.

I miss those days.

Still have kids at home?

Don’t neglect the good days.

You’ll miss them.

BTW, tell me about your kids at home. How many? How old? I’d love to pray for them with you!

I have to be honest. I was a reluctant empty-nester. Cheryl and I love our boys and them being at home was one of our greatest joys in life. Walking in the door and being handed a football to throw or a soccer ball to kick was often the best part of my day.

We were intentional as parents and in our marriage, however, so now we are reaping the reward of that intentionality. We raised our boys to be independent and they are doing that well. They still “need” us, but they aren’t dependent on us. At the same time, we protected our relationship, so we truly enjoy our time together…always have…still do.

As hard as it’s been for me to see my boys leave home, I’m now learning to adjust to and actually enjoy being an empty-nester.

Here are 5 joys of being an empty-nester:

Spontaneous living – Cheryl and I can now change plans on a dime. Someone asks us to dinner, but they are leaving “now”…no problem. Suddenly deciding to go out of town for the weekend…why not?

More time for ministry – We are busier in ministry than ever before. Cheryl ministers to multiple women in the church and my ministry in and outside my home church continues to grow. We love serving others and now we have time to do it.

Planned chaos – Cheryl and I live a crazy life, but we have the freedom within that craziness to adjust our schedule as we see fit. When children are in the house, much of your schedule is dictated by their activities. Now, we decide what is going to control our time. We can never anticipate what’s going to happen, but we have the freedom to adjust to it as we choose.

Rekindled relationship - Cheryl and I have always loved our life together. As I said, we continued to date throughout our parenting days, so our relationship remained strong. Now, we are in a new season in our relationship. It’s a good season. We love our time together.

Unbridled future – We keep saying to each other that we can do anything we want. We are free to walk by faith as God leads. It’s a very good feeling. Let’s do it God! What’s next?

Let me be clear, if you have children at home, enjoy them now. You’ll miss them, but if you continue to work on your relationship, and you prepare your children to stand on their own, you’ll one day get to enjoy the blessings of being a joyful empty-nester.

Any empty-nesters out there? What do you like about this season of life?

Here are some things I’ve learned raising boys.

People ask me all the time for advice on raising girls, and honestly, I’ve got some, but they all involve a shotgun and long ankle-length dresses, so you probably don’t want that. Seriously, I always wanted a girl, but I think God knew what He was doing by giving me boys. (Imagine that!) I’m afraid I’d be way over-protective of a girl.

Anyway, one thing I’ve experienced being the parent of boys is that boys are desperate for wisdom, but they are often either timid about asking for it or maybe they just never think to do so. (Someone told me guys seldom ask for directions either, but I’m having a hard time believing that one. )

I’m incredibly close to my two boys…ask anyone…but even still, I’ve observed there is something in them that wants to appear not to need the help at times. Something in a guy resists the need for help, even when they need the help. I wanted the type relationship with my sons where they would always feel welcome and ready to learn from my experience. I’m blessed to say both my boys call me weekly, if not sometimes daily, asking for help making life decisions.

How do you get your sons to want to come to you for wisdom, long after they leave home?

Here was my plan:

Do activities they want to do – I spent lots of time with my boys, but I did that by assuming their interests. If it was baseball or wrestling, I loved and lived what they loved. I know dads who try to get their boys to love fishing or golf because they love fishing or golf. I simply chose my interests around theirs.

Stay close – Boys are growing to become men. They want to be independent. Some days they won’t want you around as much as others. (That may sound appealing for a moment when they are colicky as infants, but believe me you will miss them.) I tried to stay close enough that I was there when they were ready for me. Ephesians 6 says not to exasperate the children. I simply tried not to get in the way, but to always be available when needed. I found I was “needed” more often that way.

Be attentive – Like all men I always had plenty I could be doing. I tried to let the boy’s time be the boy’s time. Children know when you’re not really being attentive. There were times my boys told me I needed to put my phone down. I listened. I wanted them to feel I was listening to what mattered to them.

Offer wisdom more than solutions – I wrote about that in THIS POST, but I tried to help my boys form a paradigm for finding an answer, rather than give them the answer. This way they were able to be independent young men, who wanted to find their own way, but yet they had access to the wisdom of experience.

Love their friends – My boys knew their friends were always welcome in our house. They knew I’d fix them lots of pancakes on Saturday morning. They knew we stocked our fridge with every drink their friends might like, just in case our house was the hangout house for the night. They knew the door was always wide open for anyone they brought through them. We didn’t always approve of their choices in friends, but we talked them through it and tried to steer them towards better friends, but never turned away their choice of friends.

There are probably other suggestions I could share, but if you are raising boys, you probably need to go break up a fight or stop them from jumping off something. We can talk more later.

What suggestions do you have for raising boys?

When you’re having trouble communicating…

When you can’t get children to respond appropriately…

When your team isn’t cooperating…

When the marriage is struggling…

Before you address the problem with the other person…

Ask, “What’s wrong with me?”

First…

What in you needs changing?

In what ways are you contributing to the problem?

How could you communicate differently?

Before you address the problems with others…

Look inside yourself…

Obviously, as a child of God, we start with God, allow Him to examine our hearts and shape us into His image, but in my experience, we often we look at the other person first…and think it’s all about them. I think we have a responsibility to humbly consider our own shortcomings. Many times, if we will look at ourself, we’ll either find the problem or we’ll find a better way to address the problem.

Get to know the person in the mirror…

Before you criticize others…

Could this principle change the way you lead?

It’s simple…but oh so important to remember…

It’s a principle true in leadership and life

People don’t know what they don’t know

It’s hard to hold an employee accountable for something they never knew

You can’t expect your spouse to remember things you never told him or her

It’s hard to be disappointed no one comforted you in your pain if they didn’t know you were hurting

Your child can’t live up to a standard you never set

People don’t know what they don’t know

If you want them to know…don’t assume they do…tell them

My good friend Daniel Doss gets real and vulnerable to share how his popular song “Stained Glass Windows” became a song. (Daniel helped plant Grace Community Church as our first worship pastor.) If you’ve ever struggled to understand the hand of God, watch this:

To download the song, click HERE.

Thank you Daniel!

Here’s a guest post from 11 year-old Mallory Fundora. Mallory and her family are active members of Grace Community Church. I love her vision and passion. She reminds me of Isaiah 11:6 “and a little child will lead them”. Be inspired…

Here are the words of Mallory Fundora:

In October 2011 I sat down to write my Christmas list for my parents, I looked around my room and I realized there was nothing I needed, nothing I wanted. But the more I thought about it, the more I thought about the children in Africa, and how they weren’t going to get Christmas presents, and there was a lot of things that they needed. So, I sent my mom an email with my Christmas list, one thing on it, to help Africa.

See, in August of 2010 the Ugandan Orphan Children’s Choir came to my church to perform, and I got to meet the children, and they were amazing. They were so loving, and just wanted to hug me and hold my hand. My mom had also started doing work for a couple of organizations that helped in Uganda, so she had taught me about the children there.

The day after I sent the email my Mom and I sat down and talked about what I wanted to do, and how I wanted to help. I contacted Amazima Ministries and Project Have Hope and I told them what I wanted to do, and I asked them how I could best help them. That is how Project Yesu was born. My goals at first were simple, I wanted to raise $600 to sponsor 2 children, one from Amazima and one from Project Have Hope. When you sponsor a child, it pays for food, medicine and sends them to school. I also decided I wanted to send Christmas cards to the children in Uganda, I mean who doesn’t like to get a card, it makes you smile. So I drew two different card designs and I contacted a local printing company and asked them if they would donate the printing of 650 cards, they did.

So I started to tell people about Project Yesu, and my mom helped me start a blog so people could read about it. I met with my Children’s pastor and asked if our youth group could help me with the cards, because I wanted them to be personal, so I needed a lot of help to write out 650 cards. I also spoke to my youth group, and told them about Project Yesu and about the children in Uganda and asked them to help me raise money. Every week I set up a booth at my church to tell people about my project, and the word spread.

In only 8 weeks I raised over $2,400 and I was able to sponsor 7 children. It was way more then I had originally planned on and it was great. I got to meet some wonderful people, and tell them my story. I was invited to go to WAYFM a Christian radio station because they learned about my project, and I was even on TV. The NBC station out of Nasvhille did a story on Project Yesu.

I read a quote one day from Mahatma Ghandi that said, “Be the change you want to see in the world”. That’s what I want to do, I want to be the change, I want to make a difference, I want to help people. Everyone thinks kids are selfish or that we’re just kids and we can’t do anything like this. I want to show people what a difference one person can make. If someone, because they heard about me, or met me, decides that they can be a change too, then it will spread from me, to that person, to another person and so on. Kids have good ideas, and you know what? We don’t know all the reasons why it won’t work, we just know we what we want to do.

I know with Project Yesu, I am making a difference, not only in the lives of the seven children in Uganda who now have food, medicine and can go to school. But I am making a difference in the lives of my family, my friends, my teachers and even people I have never met before.

I want Project Yesu to continue to spread and grow, and to do that I need people like you, who are reading this post to spread the word and to help me. My goals for 2012 is to raise $4,500 – who knows maybe I’ll double that this year or even triple that and be able to help more and more children in Uganda. I plan to travel to Uganda in December of 2012 to hand deliver the Christmas cards to the children, to meet my sponsored children and to love on the children of Uganda who have changed my life.

If you want to know more about Project Yesu, or how you can help you can find me on Facebook – www.facebook.com/projectyesu or go to my site www.projectyesu.org.

I am selling T-shirts and wristbands to raise funds, and I am also looking for families, groups, classrooms or anyone to be a part of the “Be The Change” campaign by collecting coins to donate towards Project Yesu.

So I have accepted the challenge to be the change…. Will you?

I’ve got something BIG to share with you today. Some of you may remember last year’s Gifts of Water Team Challenge campaign. Ron Edmondson was a part of it and nearly 6,000 people (soon to be 9,000) received the gift of safe water and the opportunity to hear the Living Water Message through your efforts. The Proof – Malindi, Jaffna College

This year, Water Missions International is launching a major church initiative called Water Sunday. Water Sunday is one Sunday that a church dedicates to the global water crisis. All the materials will be provided to you to make this a fun and energizing Sunday for your church. Churches across the country are hosting Water Sunday’s in March. (March 22nd is World Water Day) You will be amazed at the work that the Holy Spirit will do in your church members hearts when they look outward at those in need around the world.

Water Sunday from Water Missions on Vimeo.

Here’s what you should know:

• All the materials are provided. (promo video, lesson materials, graphics, sermon notes)
• March 2012 is the focus month, but you can choose to host a different time that fits in your ministry schedule.
• The global water crisis takes the life of one child every twenty seconds.
• Connect your church community with communities in the developing world.
• Share the love of Christ in a tangible way and equip a local pastor with a valuable tool to share the gospel!

In the following months – inspiring photos, videos, and stories will come back showing the direct impact your church made.

Expect God to show up in BIG ways!

Visit the Water Sunday Website to learn more and sign up your church NOW!

Here is a short testimony of this impact:

“People are always questioning about how this system works and asking how they can acquire it. We always tell them about our Great God and there we end up with the chance of preaching to them the gospel. Can you imagine that even non believers come willing to offer us land to plant churches because of this water system. Not one or two, many have come to us! So to us, it is an iron tool for the gospel.” Pastor Charles – Glory Center church – Neddje, Uganda

Merry Christmas!

It has been a great year for the Edmondson’s.

We spent our first full year in our downtown condo. We love it. When weather and schedules cooperate, we walk downtown at night and through the campus of Austin Peay State University (our Alma mater and the fastest growing university in our state). We even dine on campus some nights. You can’t beat $14 for all you can eat for two of us! We love sitting on our front porch, which overlooks the river walk. At Christmas time, we can see the lights and hear the music. It’s been a great change of pace for these new empty-nesters.

Did I mention I haven’t mowed a lawn in over a year?

Jeremy and Mary had a beach wedding in May. It was a beautiful day surrounded by close friends and immediate family. It was the most special wedding I’ve ever performed. The happy couple…they really are very happy together…live in downtown Nashville, where they, too, overlook the river, as well as Titans stadium. Jeremy has proven to be a hard worker and is doing well in his new career in marketing and social media. Jeremy and Mary love Pete Wilson‘s Cross Point Church in Nashville and are active in their community group.

Nate has a year left at Moody Bible Institute. He will graduate a semester early next December and then plans to attend seminary. We are exploring those options now. Nate spent the summer studying with Moody in Europe. He experienced Germany, Italy and Switzerland and made memories that will last a lifetime. He is blessed to work with Jarrett and Jeanne Stevens at Soul City Church in Chicago, where they have given him multiple opportunities to serve. Nate did the music and production for a Christmas album this year. It’s free. I wrote about it HERE.

It’s a blessing to know your children continue to love the body of Christ and remain active in church when they leave home. I’m thankful for those who are investing in them.

Cheryl and I remain extremely busy in ministry and life. We joke that we truly live an “abundant” life. We aren’t still long, but God is giving us incredible opportunities for Kingdom-influence during this season. This year our ministry opportunities have grown within Grace and beyond. We do not want to waste a minute of what God wants to do with our life!

This Christmas, I realize I’m blessed far beyond what I deserve. I’m happily married to my best friend, we have children who honor Christ with their life, and we have enough material things that we have plenty to share with others. This has been a good year.

There have been years it was harder to write those words, but I’m just old enough to know, whether good seasons or bad, God is in control, He has a plan, and all things truly do work for an ultimate good.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!