7 Qualities of Good Change Agent Leaders

Chalkboard with text Changes

If you want to be in leadership get comfortable with change. It’s part of the experience of every leader. The best leaders get accustomed to leading change.

Every leader deals with change, but in my experience, some handle it better than others. There are change agent leaders who seem to have an innate gifting at leading through change. I love to learn from these special leaders.

I’ve observed some common characteristics change agent leaders share.

Here are 7 qualities of good change agents:

Flexible – It doesn’t have to be their design. They simply want progress towards the overall vision. These change agents are never stubborn on matters that seem to have no vision-altering value. They navigate towards a solution, letting others have “their” way. Everyone walks away feeling as though they have won.

Courageous – Change agent leaders are willing to receive criticism and still move forward. They know how to filter through what is valid criticism — worth hearing — and what’s simply a venting of personal interest. They unwaveringly push through the junk that clouds progress.

Relational – Good change agent leaders value the opinions of other people and work hard to gain trust. They know that ultimate change can’t happen without human capital and they are constantly investing in relationships. Networking is one of a change agents greatest tools.

Strategic – A change agent leader realizes there are steps to take and they carefully choose the timing of when to take them. They almost have a keen sense of discernment when it comes to knowing when to pull the trigger, when to wait, and when to pull the plug completely.

Creative – Good change agents are able to see paths to success others can’t yet see. I need to be honest here and say that I’d rather be strategic than creative. There are some who can always find a way to make their ideas work, but it comes at the expense of others. But, change happens with creativity. Effective change is one of the best forms of art in the field of leadership. That takes creativity.

Intentional – Change agent leaders make change for a specific purpose. They never waste a change. They know that every change has the potential to make or break a team and they work diligently to bring the best results.

Thorough – A good change agent follows through on commitments made and sees the change to fruition. They don’t give up until the post evaluation is complete and the lessons of change have been learned.

Think about your experience. Who are some of the best change agent leaders you have known?

7 Ways We Keep Our Marriage Strong

happy couple 2

Cheryl and I are in a good season of life and marriage. We’ve been empty-nesters for a few years now — we’ve adjusted — it was hard missing our boys at first — but now life is good. Really good.

This weekend we had a destination wedding (I love those) and added a few days for time just the two of us. We needed it. As great as a season as we are in it’s a busy season. We’ve been running hard for several months.

The good thing — we can’t think of anyone we’d rather be with when we are off from work.

Isn’t that a great feeling?

Cheryl and I intentionally strive to keep our marriage strong. It’s a work in progress. We know that if we ever let up the enemy will win. The Scripture is clear — Satan crawls around like a roaring lion, waiting to devour.

So, how do we keep our marriage strong? I’ve been asked that so many times.

Here are 7 ways we keep our marriage strong:

We walk. Cheryl and I walk together almost every day. When weather and time permits, we walk hours and miles together. This may sound strange unless you’ve experienced it, but as an introvert, I talk more — and am more comfortable doing so — when I am being physically active at the same time. When my boys were home, I engaged more when we were throwing a ball together. For Cheryl and me, it’s walking. And, here’s the key: Our communication is strengthened when we have an activity we do together regularly. So — we walk.

We talk. And, that’s so incredibly important. Every day we talk about our days. We debrief our life. There are always moments of the day we would have to explain to understand them. We explain. It cuts down the surprise factors in our life. I’m a part of every aspect of Cheryl’s life — and she is of mine. Our work. Our friends. Our families. Our hobbies. Our thoughts. Our fears. Our dreams.

We question. Cheryl and I have been known to ask some strange questions of each other. More than, “What are you thinking?”. Cheryl or I might ask something such as, “If you had one prayer — and only one prayer — for our boys, or for me, what would it be?” Questions that may seem silly to some, but to us they make perfect sense, because it keeps us thinking deeper about our life and each other.

We dream. Everyone has them. Some of us hide them better than others. Cheryl and I have a consistent habit of dreaming together. No dream is too small or too large. It’s a dream. It may or may not become reality, but that’s okay. It’s fun and energizing of our relationship to dream together.

We laugh. A lot. We don’t have the same sense of humor, but it doesn’t matter. We enjoy laughing together about whatever there is to laugh about at the time. It would probably be silly and not funny to anyone else, but that’s okay. Our mutual humor keeps us close at heart.

We cry. Okay, I’ve got to be honest on this one. I’m not a big crier. I cry, but very selectively and very privately. But, Cheryl and I share something with each other. We are vulnerable to each other. Very vulnerable. I’m not afraid to tell her I’m afraid. That I’m hurt. That I wish life was different than it is — even if I have to say it with tears in my eyes. Our lives are open books with one another. It builds a closeness that is hard to destroy.

We love. Deeply. I’ve heard it said I’d rather be deeply loved than widely loved. Cheryl and I deeply love each other. It’s the kind of love that can overlook the flaws we bring to the relationship. And, we bring a lot. Mostly me. But, love is ultimately a choice we make — a deep, committed, loyal kind of choice. I choose Cheryl. She chooses me.

That’s our seven. Do you have more to share?

What keeps your marriage strong?

20 Things God Might Say

various kind of quote boxes

I sent out a couple of tweets recently that received some attention. They had the hashtag #ThingsGodMightSay and were intentionally designed to encourage people.

In my work, I always know a lot of struggling people. I see social media as an outlet for ministry.

So, I decided to expand on the theme.

Here are 20 #ThingsGodMightSay:

I thought about you today. A lot. #ThingsGodMightSay

I forgave you. Shouldn’t you forgive him? #ThingsGodMightSay

Don’t worry. I’ve got this. #ThingsGodMightSay

What do you think about the butterfly? Yea, I’m pretty proud of that one too! #ThingsGodMightSay

That love one another thing — I meant it. #ThingsGodMightSay

Did you miss the part about me being a jealous God? #ThingsGodMightSay

When you get time, can we talk? #ThingsGodMightSay

I wrote this book. Have you read it lately? #ThingsGodMightSay

No, it wasn’t a mistake. You just can’t see the whole picture right now. Just wait… #ThingsGodMightSay

I can tell — you’re worried again. You forgot about my promises to you, didn’t you? #ThingsGodMightSay

Have you thought about my son lately? Isn’t He wonderful? #ThingsGodMightSay

Restoring broken people. It’s kind of one of my specialties. #ThingsGodMightSay

Today’s a great day to follow me. #ThingsGodMightSay

I’ve loved you since the minute I thought of you — which was way before your time. #ThingsGodMightSay

Quit trying to be like everyone else. I’m pretty proud of who I designed you to be. #ThingsGodMightSay

Have you ever watched a child giggle? Yea, that gets me every time too. #ThingsGodMightSay

I love what you’re doing with Instagram, but you haven’t seen anything yet. #ThingsGodMightSay

Waiting doesn’t offend me. I’ve got plenty of time. #ThingsGodMightSay

You can trust me. Seriously. #ThingsGodMightSay

No matter how hard you try, or how good you are, this is NOT going to work without me! #ThingsGodMightSay

Feel free to tweet your favorite.

Let me be clear that I’m not assuming I have anything to say for God. He can and has spoken for Himself. Every time I preach I try to amplify His Word and help people apply truth to their life. That’s my goal here. It’s just an attempt to provide a fun, easy to read way to get concepts and encouragements of God into our minds. For ultimate truth, stick with what’s already been written — The Bible.

What would you share of #ThingsGodMightSay?

Balancing Leading for Me and Leading for the Organization

balanced

Every leader needs to balance the tension of “leading for me and leading for the organization.”

I balance it everyday.

Here’s what I mean.

I’m sometimes going to lead for me. My preferences. My tastes. My individual style is going to be reflected in the church. That’s part of leadership.

I’m certain leadership of the people looked different under Moses than under Joshua. (Joshua apparently didn’t have a stick. :) )

If my leadership is effective at all it will have an impact on the church. At the same time, I have to be very careful as I lead, and with the structures we implement, and the vision I cast, that I’m not being egocentric. We have a bigger vision at stake. Hopefully the church lasts much longer than me.

I know the church is going to resemble me. It is going to reflect my leadership.

But the church doesn’t need to look like me. It should look like Jesus.

Do you see the difference?

This is a tension for every organization. Christian or not. Non-profit or for profit.

Consider Apple. Apple resembles Steve Jobs. It should. He built the company. He’s a mastermind behind it all. But it didn’t need to look like Steve Jobs. It needed to look like Apple. Imagine what would happen now if it had only been built around Steve Jobs. Apple looks like Apple. That’s a good thing if you like Apple products.

I see too many planters and pastors shaping the culture to look like them. It’s dangerous. It’s not sustainable. And, frankly, I don’t think it’s Biblical. When they leave the church will likely struggle with an identity crisis.

Here are some ways I attempt to balance this tension:

  • If the decision has long-term implications I include multiple voices.
  • I try not to always have an answer to every problem.
  • I surround myself with really smart people. And, give them authority to question my judgment.
  • I step back often to observe a bigger picture.
  • I’m trying to shape paradigms of good leadership more than specifics of structure.
  • I try not to micromanage.
  • I empower people to make decisions without my stamp of approval.

People want to follow a vision that is bigger than today. They want progress. And, granted, to accomplish that, people want and need a leader. I believe God even allowed things to be set up that way. The tension is to not use that felt need of people as an opportunity to build my own kingdom.

Here’s a very practical example of how that is currently playing out in our church. Our church governing structure needs some tweaking. The current system, with a monthly business meeting on a Wednesday night, where major decisions eventually have to be made, attended overwhelmingly by seniors — who by the way are among the most faithful members of our church — is not sustainable long-term. The younger generation of people are not buying into that system. They don’t care about the business of church as much as the mission of church. In 10 years, unless we make changes, the room will be much smaller and it will be difficult to get anything done effectively with our current structure. That’s not being cruel. It’s being realistic.

In recommending that we need changes, I have suggested a team that is cross representative of the church, made up of laypeople in the church. I’ve offered resources and other church models for them to consider. But, then I’ve tried to get out of the way, as much as possible. I’ve even suggested, should anyone think this is personal to me, that they make changes effective the day I leave office as pastor. (I’m not anticipating they will do this but I’m that serious about not shaping a church to look like me.)

The bottom line in this illustration is that I’m in a church that’s 105 years old. That is over twice my age. I hope this local church body survives long after I’m gone (unless of course Jesus returns.)

That will be easier if I’m not the identity of this church – Jesus is.

10 Common Traits among the Best Leaders I Ever Had

Many identical businessmen clones

All my life I’ve been a wisdom seeker. I have had some great leadership influence in my life. Beginning with my high school principal when I was student body president and a man in retail who took interest in me in college, I’ve been blessed with good role models.

Looking back, the best leaders I ever had shared some common traits.

10 Common Traits among the Best Leaders I Ever Had

Believed in me more than I believed in myself.

Were available to me when I needed them.

Ask good questions of me.

Challenged me to be better than I thought I could be.

Encouraged my dreams, while equally providing for me a sense of reality.

Had a character worthy of following.

Were skillful and competent, but not arrogant or self-serving.

Continued to learn personally.

Were visionary and challenged mediocrity.

Kept their word, but didn’t over-commit themselves.

Would you add any to my list from the best leaders in your life?

7 Ways to Stretch Yourself as a Leader

Close-up of a jogger stretching his legs

Those who succeed in the future workplace must be innovative. Adaptable. Able to change quickly.

You knew that, right?

It’s not an option these days.

It’s mandatory just to keep up with the pace of change. We can wish for days gone by, but to keep up, leaders will have to stretch themselves and work smarter.

In fact, when hiring decisions are made these days, most leaders I know (including me) look for these abilities as much, if not more, than experience or education. We need generalists, who can fill a plethora of responsibilities. If you can’t keep up with the speed of change, and adapt accordingly you’ll have a harder time advancing in your career in the future.

How can a leader keep up? What can you do?’

I am constantly learning how personally, but I have always been conscious of my own need to continue growing as a leader, so I’m sharing from my experience and some of what works for me.

Here are 7 ways to stretch yourself:

Read something different from what you normally read. If you love to read history, occasionally read a book of fiction. Pick up a tech magazine, even if you’re far from being a techie. Read the comics, or the opinion page, or a biography — whatever something is different from what you usually read.

Hang out with people not like you. One of my favorite ways to stretch myself has been to surround myself with many different personalities and interests among my friendships. I am introverted. I have some very extroverted friends. I’m not usually loud in a crowd — and a few of my close friends are always the life of the party. I’m conservative. I have some very liberal friends. Honestly, it’s sometimes more comfortable to only hang out with people who think like me, but I realize I’m missing opportunities to grow when I do.

Move forward on something with uncertainty. This will be a challenge for some of you reading this. For others it’s easy. It comes fairly easy for me. But, the fact is rarely will we have all the answers when making decisions. That eliminates faith when we do, by the way. Take a new risk on something. It’s the surest way to stretch yourself.

Attempt something you’ve never done. That goes with taking a risk, but not only something that you consider “risky” — try to do something beyond what you think you can do. Take a college class, even though you’ve been out of school for years. Learn a language or to play an instrument. Take up photography or baking. Try to do a home repair — with just the help of the guy at the hardware store. If you’ve never done it — all the better. The more different from you it seems — the greater the stretch.

Spend more time on opportunities than on problems. This is huge, because problems tend to weigh us down and discourage us. Opportunities challenge and encourage us. Yes, fixing problems is exhilarating for some of us (like me), but only getting back to ground zero pales compared to finding new potential for growth. We can’t avoid handling problems, but we can discipline ourselves to focus more energy towards advancement rather than repair. Try it. In my experience, when I do this, some of the problems I thought needed so much of my attention no longer do.

Schedule and discipline time to dream. Dreaming can quickly become a lost art in a sea of mediocrity and repetition. We get so caught up in systems, routines and processes that we fail to imagine what is yet to be realized. I try to schedule a few hours a week of blank calendar time and shut everything down to think and pray. Sometimes I take a walk. Sometimes I read. Always I try to think of something new.

Stay physically active. Numerous studies I’ve read indicate what my experience already knows. I stretch my mind when I stretch my body. And, the more I stretch my body, the more I stretch my mind.

I realize an obvious question some of my ministry friends are wondering. How does this apply to the church?

Well, I personally believe the church should be well led, well-managed, efficient and productive. We have the greatest mission challenge ever extended. We are in a life-changing profession. Why would we ever sacrifice quality or settle for less than best in carrying out our work? So, of course this impacts ministry. We must continue to stretch ourselves to become better servant leaders.

What ideas do you have to stretch yourself as a leader?

20 Things Good Dads Do!

Father singing

What good dads do — like nobody else can do.

They joke.

They challenge.

They inspire.

They build.

They provide.

They encourage.

They discipline.

They listen.

They counsel.

They validate.

They play.

They model.

They pray.

They forgive.

They teach.

They strengthen.

They believe.

They lead.

They protect.

They love.

Dads!

There are no perfect ones — except our Heavenly Dad — but good dads try. Every good dad I know wants to do the best he can.

And, some good dads have left us already — at least from this earth — and still, they do what they do through the memories they left behind.

Give a shoutout to a good dad today!

Thank you God, for good dads.

Which of these remind you most of a good dad you know?

My 10 Favorite Cities In Which To Run

running alone

I’m an avid runner. It’s my best thinking time. If I’m out of town, I usually run longer distances because of the new surroundings. I’ve had some glorious running experiences.

Here are my favorite cities (communities) in which to run, somewhat in order:

  • Chicago
  • Washington, D.C.
  • Philadelphia
  • New York City
  • Minneapolis, MN
  • San Francisco, CA
  • Dallas, TX
  • Lexington, KY
  • Saugatuck, MI
  • Santa Monica, CA

This is actually my domestic list. I have had some international running opportunities. I may rank them someday.

Do you know of a great city in which to run?

Tell me where I am missing.

7 Reasons Introversion Works Well for Me as a Senior Leader

Sarcastic background

I read an article recently that suggested the majority of senior leaders think extroversion is necessary to be an effective senior leader. Obviously — and hopeful I am correct — I disagree. In fact, I see benefits in being an introverted senior leader.

I also know people who can’t believe I can pastor a large church and be introverted. I’ve written before about the false assumptions of introverts. Introverts can be just as caring, loving and “shepherding” as extroverts. It’s a personality trait, not a heart monitor. But, again, I see benefits in being a lead pastor and an introvert.

Here are 7 ways introversion works well for me as a senior leader:

I think first and speak later. I don’t stick my foot in my mouth very many times. I’m not saying extroverts do, but I am saying that as an introverts I tend to choose my words very carefully. One characteristic of the personality is we don’t speak quickly. We choose our words more intentionally. Understand, I do say things I regret, but it doesn’t happen often.

I’m less likely to struggle with the loneliness of leadership. This is a real leadership emotion, and I certainly have it some, but I’m very comfortable being alone in a room to my thoughts. Long runs by myself are energizing to me. I know many extroverted leaders who can get very lonely — and some days for them are very difficult, especially when they are in the midst of harder leadership decisions.

I create intentional moments. My introversion forces me to be very intentional about my time interacting with others. I say continually to introverted leaders — introversion should never be a crutch or an excuse for not engaging with people. Leadership is a relational process for all of us. But, my relational time is very focused. I tend to make the most of my time. A calendar is one of my essential leadership tools. Sunday mornings I’m the most extroverted person in our church building. It’s strategic, intentional, and I enjoy it — because I truly love people — even though it is draining.

It’s easy to concentrate on the big picture. You’ll seldom find me chit-chatting. It’s not that I don’t have casual conversations — I certainly do when I’m connecting with people — but communication for me is usually very purposeful. As a result, I tend to be able to be very big picture oriented. Very strategic in my thinking. I step back and observe everything often. I’m a deep thinker. Those are traits especially strong with most introverts. That has proven to be very profitable for my leadership and the teams I lead.

Processed randomness. People often wonder if I know how to have fun. “Pastor you seem so serious” or “What do you do for fun?” I hear comments like that frequently. Those are usually people who only see me when I’m working and don’t know me very well. And, I do work hard, but I can sometimes be seen as the class clown too — by those who get to know me. Some of that comes through online. But when those times occur, they are usually intentional times. My work is caught up, I have done all the things I have to get done, and I’m ready to “come out and play”. That quality can be in extroverts or introverts, but for me as an introvert, they are more intentional moments than spontaneous.

I network intentionally. I recognize the value of every conversation I have. So, I have lots of conversations. Every Sunday is a gold mine of networking opportunities. Plus, I meet dozens of people every week in the community where I serve. I enjoy meeting people knowing that people are my purpose — and I love people — I really do. More than that, I love how God wants to develop and grow people, and I see my role in that as a teacher. People are the reason for everything I do.

I tend to listen well. People on my team usually have a very good chance of having their voice heard, because in any meeting setting, I don’t feel the need to be the one always talking. My introversion allows me to be quiet, sit back, listen, and reflect and offer input when and where most needed.

Sure there are struggles with being an introvert at times, but I have found it to be a blessing in my leadership. It is who I am — it is NOT a curse. Much of that has to do with how I manage my introversion in an often very extroverted world.

How does introversion make you an effective leader?