Please join me in praying for our new president and his family.  Regardless of your politics, as I have said before, we need to respect the office of president.

The more I get to know about the Obama family the more I admire their family values.  I hope they bring these values to the White House and influence our culture. The commitment they have to each other as a couple and to their children is one we can all emulate. 

Here’s an interesting link I found with trivia about President-elect Barack Obama and wife Michelle.  Enjoy: Favorites of the Future First Family

We have a few chaplains in our church and one of those chaplains and his wife have graciously invited us to join them at some of the homecoming ceremonies for the soldiers of the 101^st Airborne Division at Fort Campbell returning home from their deployment to Iraq.  I never tire of watching these reunions! 

Having lived around military all my life I have as many friends in the military as I do civilians.  I love our soldiers and their families.  Some of the most loyal and caring people you will ever meet or have in your church are military connected.  Grace Community Church is loaded with military families.  I wouldn’t want it any other way!  I firmly believe that our soldiers do what they do so that I can do what I do in freedom.  I’m so thankful to live in a country where I can freely share my faith with others and I don’t take that freedom for granted. I know it comes with a huge cost.  We admire greatly the sacrifices our soldiers and their families make on our behalf. 

God bless America and our troops and their families.  I honor, respect, and love each of you!  Thank you for serving on my family’s behalf.  It is so good to be welcoming you home again! 

A tradition in our home on Thanksgiving since the boys were little has been to share the top ten things we are thankful for that year.  The list often looks similar, but putting our individual lists together and then sharing them with each other is a great way to remind us of what is truly important in life. Each year there will be one or two different items on our lists that are reflective of the previous year specifically. 

For 2008, this is my list.

1.      My salvation and relationship with Christ! 

2.      My wife.

3.      My two boys.

4.      My loving extended family.

5.      Grace Community Church

6.      An awesome staff.

7.      Great friends.

8.      Freedom and the returning troops.

9.      My health.

10.  Opportunities to learn, grow and enjoy life. 

Happy Thanksgiving!  What are you thankful for this year?

Continuing the series on the parenting model based on the Olive Tree; we are attempting to produce spiritual fruit in our children that will last for generations. You can read the beginning post HERE.  

Today we see a few more virtues we and some ways to instill them in our children. 

PATIENCE        

This is a tough one, because it is one of my weak points, but it is a part of the fruit of the Spirit God has encouraged us to have, so here are some actions to help your children have this trait: 

*Let them see you waiting patiently. (If my boys or my wife reads this they will be wondering when they will see this in me. Still, I have had to wait for many big picture things in my life many times.  I’ve attempted to do so patiently.) 

*Make children wait sometimes. Children shouldn’t get everything right away and they certainly shouldn’t be able to demand it with temper-tantrums or tears.  One statistic I read says that children today get 90% of everything they want, yet as adults they will get less than 25%.  We are setting them up for failure when we give them everything. 

*Don’t be a complainer. Do everything without complaining or arguing. (Phil 2:14)

*Don’t let your children think they are the center of the universe.  They are not; actually God is.    Encourage them, but don’t crown them kings. 

KINDNESS            

Kindness could be defined as “genuine friendliness, helpfulness and generosity”.  Here are some ways to instill kindness in your children: 

*Be a giver and not a taker.  Let your children see you giving to others regularly. 

*Never let children see you being unkind to the cashier or waitress. 

*Know your neighbors and actually have concern for them.

*Never allow degrading comments to be made to other family members. 

*Care for the hurting people of the world. 

*Be a regular giver/servant at church. 

 GOODNESS

Jesus said “well done good and faithful servant” and “a good tree produces good fruit”.  This is the opposite of bad.  (That makes sense, huh?)  To instill goodness in your children, try this:

*Reward good acts towards others. 

*Give extra praise to your children for doing good things. (That’s not buying them a toy. This can be done verbally.) 

*Never let them see parents argue and fight.            

*Demand respect always. They don’t always have to agree, but they should always have to respect. 

* Always declare truthfulness.  Never let them see you telling lies; even “little white lies”.

*Teach prompt obedience.  Don’t let them “think about” obeying you. This is especially true for younger children. 

I will continue with more traits of spiritual fruit tomorrow. 

Yesterday I introduced this series of a parenting model called Olive Tree Parenting.  If you need the introduction read it HERE.  

Here are some suggestions to help you develop this “fruit” in your children.  To be honest I need to remind you that this is a “model”. That doesn’t mean I was perfect at doing this. Some I did better than others.  The fact is, however, that we seldom hit a target we aren’t aiming for, so make this your goal and you will find it easier to achieve than with no plan at all. 

LOVE

Love is the first fruit mentioned and the most important.  Jesus said “love” was the greatest command for us all.  Please understand you can’t really teach your child to love.  You must model it for them.  Here are some actions you can take, however, to instill this fruit in their heart. 

*Ask your children questions about their life.  Get to know your child and what they are thinking.  Show you care. 

* Do everything in love…….even discipline.  (They will know when you are not acting in love. You will too.) 

*Discipline.  Don’t neglect discipline in “the name of love”.  Discipline should actually be an indication that you love them enough to train them to do the right thing.   

*Watch how you treat other groups of people; including other races and ethnic groups. 

*Watch your child’s attitude; always recognize attitudes over actions (1 Sam. 16:24) and respond accordingly. 

*Love your children’s friends. 

*Be kind to your neighbors, friends and family.  They are watching. 

*Get involved in church and community not out of compulsion, but because you love other people. 

JOY   

The goal of producing joy is not to make your children happy.  The Bible makes a distinction between joy and happiness.  (Psalm 68:3)  Here are some actions you can take to instill the fruit of joy in your child’s heart:

*Don’t reward everything.  Life should not be a big celebration.  Life shouldn’t revolve around the next big event. 

*Have a sense of humor. Have fun parenting. Let them see you having fun.

*Be positive.  Children can’t take the pressure and stress of life that an adult has to handle.

*Allow your children to enjoy life at the age they are, without trying to make them someone they are not. 

*Life is difficult and there will be trials, but let your children see you use trials as something you learn from and have faith during; trusting that God will work all things for good. 

*Remind yourself to “be joyful always”.  This is another character trait we need to model for them.

PEACE     

Peace is a foundation for other great character traits you will want your children to have.  The Bible says we can have peace that is there regardless of the storms of life.  I know many adults who would like that kind of peace. You would certainly want that for your children.  It is important to instill peace virtues into your children.  Here are some actions you can take to model peace for your children:

*Pray for your children daily in their presence. This shows them the importance of prayer and relying on God for daily strength.      

*Teach them to pray. Jesus taught His disciples to pray.  Help your children understand they can talk with God anytime. They will catch on quickly.  Faith comes much easier when built as a child. 

*Let them see you read your Bible regularly. 

*Talk about your faith.  Peace is found in a relationship and they need to see that modeled for them. 

*Remain cool in stressful situations as best as you can.  It’s okay that they see you emotional, but they should quickly see you display a peace that surpasses understanding.

Stay tuned for more character “fruit” trait building activities tomorrow. 

Every time I write about parenting, people email me asking for more.  I understand.  Parenting is hard work.  Most people who follow my ministry know this is one area of my life that I have taken very serious.  One specific desire Cheryl and I had in raising our children was to encourage them to love Christ and display His character.  It’s great to teach our children how to play sports or to do well in school, and I think we should, but our greatest goal should be to help them be people who aspire to have good character; specifically the character of Christ. 
 
Recognizing that the Bible is a great guide, I once developed a model for parenting called Olive Tree Parenting.  This model is based upon a couple verses of Scripture. 
  
Psalm 128:3 says, “Your sons will be like olive shoots around your table.” 
Psalm 144:12 says, “Our sons in their youth will be like well-nurtured plants.” 
     
Here are a few facts about olive trees:
   
*They were a symbol of peace and happiness to Hebrews.
*It takes some varieties 8-10 years to even bear fruit.
*It takes 20-50 years for an olive tree to be mature and really productive.
*No one knows for sure how long they grow, but estimate is at least 300-600 years, with some estimates up to 2000 years.
*When the tree trunk of an olive tree dies new sprouts come out keeping the tree alive.
*Olive trees are evergreens. 
     
Using the Biblical model of olive trees I saw some easy parallels in raising children.  I firmly believe we are more likely to get out of life what we actually aim for, so our goal became to raise children to be adults that bear righteous fruit for generations and we began to think strategically how to develop Biblical characteristics of fruit in our two boys. 
   
The Bible also gives us some clear indication of what righteous fruit looks like.  Galatians  5:22-23 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”
   
Over the next few days I will address each one of these aspects of spiritual fruit and provide some action steps to help realize this fruit in our children. 

Who can forget Steve Martin’s famous line in the 1979 movie “The Jerk” when the family received the new phone books?   Growing up I remember that same emotion.  As soon as we got our new phone book we would quickly look up our listing, then our family members, and our neighbors.  As I got older I would also look to see who had the best Yellow Page ad placement. It was enough to yell out in reminiscent form “The new phone book’s here! The new phone book’s here!”  (Okay, so maybe I’ve lived a boring life, but I’m illustrating a point!) 

Yesterday we received our new phone book.  It was in a disposable plastic bag and thrown on the street at the end of our driveway. No fanfare here.  I didn’t even check to see if my name was spelled correctly.  Instead, I tried to recall if I had ever opened the phone book they threw at our house last year.  Haven’t things changed? 

Today when I need a number I use Google text or check a website.  Sometimes I simply Google the business, person or even phone number I am looking for.  There are so many options these days.  Honestly, though, I kind of miss the hoopla over receiving a new phone book, but that missing excitement only reminds me how much culture is different from when I was growing up.  We used to get excited about the little things of life.

I wonder if I’m the only one who joined the Jerk in celebrating the new phone book each year.  Do you miss it?  What memories of previous era come to your mind that you miss today?   

Every corner of our country has a uniqueness in their culinary delights.

A friend of mine’s daughter is having a nervous day. Tonight she is having dinner for the first time at her new boyfriend’s house and she already knows what’s on the menu; cheese grits. Being from the Northwest United States, she has no idea what they are, she just assumes she won’t like them.

It brings up an interesting discussion in my mind. In our community group we have several from other parts of the country who are culturally ignorant to the ways of the South. For example, several in our group have never enjoyed the salty taste of country ham. (In fact they think we eat everything too salty.) Several have never heard of chess pie. (Don’t even mention the term “buttermilk pie” to them.) They think we eat grass when we mention turnip greens.

It makes me wonder. Have they ever really lived? Do their taste buds even like them as people? While they’ve been eating cheese curds and huckleberry pie; we’ve been enjoying real food as God intended food to be eaten. (I kinda feel sorry for them, but at least they are in a location where they can finally learn about the delicacies of life.)

What other food specialties come to your mind that differentiates us geographically in the United States?